Funny Jokes About Alabama Crimson Tide
Jokes About Alabama Football
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Q: Did you hear that the governor's mansion in Alabama burned down?
A: Almost took out the whole trailer park.
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Q: This memorable scene from the film Sweet Home Alabama pretty much speaks for itself!
A: At least in Alabama, we keep it all in the family. Eww!!!
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Q: How do you make Alabama cookies?
A: Put them in a big bowl and beat for three hours.
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Q: It's reported that Nick Saban will only dress 20 players for the Tennessee game.
A: The rest will have to dress themselves.
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Q: What does the average Alabama student get on his SAT score?
A: Drool.
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Q: What did the Alabama graduate say to the Tennessee graduate?
A: Welcome to McDonald's, may I take your order please?
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Q: Why should the University of Alabama change it's team name to the opossums?
A: Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.
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Q: Where was O.J. really hiding at right before the famous Bronco chase?
A: On the campus at Alabama. He figured they would never find a real football player there.
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Q: What do you call a good looking girl on the University of Alabama campus?
A: A Visitor.
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Q: What should you do if you find three Alabama fans buried up to their necks in cement?
A: Get more cement.
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Q: What do a maggot and an Alabama fan have in common?
A: They can both live off of a dead bear for 20 years.
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Q: Why did O. J. Simpson want to move to Alabama?
A: Everyone has the same DNA.
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Q: What new law was recently passed in Alabama?
A: When a couple gets divorced, they're still brother and sister!
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Q: What's the best thing to ever come out of Alabama?
A: I-20 and I-10
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Q: What do Alabamans do on Halloween?
A: Pump kin!
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Q: What are the best four years of an Auburn Tigers life?
A: Third grade
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Q: What does a Alabama native and a bottle of beer have in common?
A: They're both empty from the neck up.
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Q: What do tornadoes and graduates from the University of Alabama have in common?
A: They both end up in trailer parks.
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Q: What do the University of Alabama and pot have in common?
A: They both get smoked in bowls!
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Q: How do they separate the men from the boys at Auburn?
A: With a restraining order.
Alabama Football Puns Jokes
Funny alabama football jokes
Q: What do you call a mob of white people in Alabama?
A: A lynching.
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Q: Was at the Alabama vs. Auburn game I feel bad for all the Alabama fans who drove their houses to the game yesterday.
A: Why is Alabama the smartest state in the USA? Because it has 4 As and one B!
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Q: A hurricane is a lot like a divorce in Alabami...
A: Somebody is gonna lose a trailer!
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Q: What is 20 feet long and has 5 teeth?
A: The funnel cake line at the Alabama state fair.
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Q: What's the difference between an Alabama football player and a dollar?
A: You can get four quarters out of a dollar.
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Q: Why don't girls play hide and seek in Alabama?
A: No one would look for them.
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Q: How do you know the toothbrush was invented in Alabama?
A: If it was invented anywhere else, it would have been called a teethbrush.
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Q: Why is Auburn always in the dark?
A: Because they're afraid of Alabama Power.
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Q: What does the average University of South Alabama student get on his SAT?
A: Drool.
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Q: How can you tell if a wolf caught in a trap is from Alabama?
A: He's chewed off 3 legs, and he's still in the trap.
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Q: Did you hear about the fire in University of Alabama's football dorm that destroyed 20 books?
A: The real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet.
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Q: Did you hear about the $4,000,000 Alabama State Lottery?
A: The winner gets $4 a year for a million years.
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Q: What's the best thing to ever come out of Alabama?
A: I-20 and I-10.
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Q: Why did they build the Mercedes plant so close to the University of Alabama?
A: Because they have an endless supply of crash test dummies right down the road.
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Q: How is a South Alabama Jaguars girl different from a bowling ball?
A: Sometimes a bowling ball is hard to pick up.
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Q: What do UofA grads use for Birth Control?
A: Their personalities.
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Q: How do you break a South Alabama grads finger?
A: Punch him in the nose.
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Q: How do you get a Troy State fan to laugh all weekend long?
A: Tell him a joke Monday morning.
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Q: Why do South Alabama fans smell so bad?
A: So blind people can hate them too.
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Q: Why did Auburn change their field from grass to artificial turf?
A: To keep the Tigers cheerleaders from grazing the field at halftime.
Funny Alabama Football Jokes
Jokes about alabama football
Q: How do you keep Alabama Crimson Tide out of your yard?
A: Put up goal posts.
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Q: Why did the Alabama Crimson Tide grad cover her ears?
A: She was trying to hold in a thought.
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Q: How do you neuter a Crimson Tide fan?
A: Kick his sister in the jaw!
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Q: What do Alabama Crimson Tide Football players always get on their final exams?
A: Drool.
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Q: Did you hear about the Alabama Crimson Tide fan who won a gold medal at the Olympics?
A: He liked it so much that he decided to get it bronzed.
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Q: What's the difference between Alabama Crimson Tide cheerleaders and The Titanic?
A: Only 1,000 went down on The Titanic.
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Q: What's the biggest lie told at Alabama?
A: "I was just helping that sheep over the fence."
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Q: What is the difference between a litter of puppies and Alabama Crimson Tide fans?
A: Eventually puppies grow up and stop whining.
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Q: What do Crimson Tide cheerleaders and Crimson Tide quarterbacks have in common?
A: They're always on their backs.
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Q: Why did Alabama disband its water polo team?
A: All the horses drowned.
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Q: How did the Alabama Crimson Tide fan die from drinking milk?
A: The cow fell on him!
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Q: Did you hear about the Alabama Crimson Tide fan who tried to blow up the opponents team bus?
A: He burned his lip on the tailpipe.
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Q: If you have a car containing a Alabama Crimson Tide wide receiver, a Alabama Crimson Tide linebacker, and a Alabama Crimson Tide defensive back, who is driving the car?
A: The cop.
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Q: What do you call a good looking girl on the Alabama campus?
A: A visitor.
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Q: How do Crimson Tide brain cells die?
A: Alone.
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Q: What is the definition of safe sex down at Alabama?
A: Placing signs on the animals that kick.
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Q: Why dont Crimson Tide fans use 911 in an emergency?
A: Because they cannot find "eleven" on the phone dial.
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Q: How many Alabama Crimson Tide does it take to change a tire?
A: One, unless it's a blowout, in which case they all show up
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Q: Why do Alabama Crimson Tide fans like smart women?
A: Opposites attract.
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Q: Why can't Alabama Crimson Tide players go on the internet?
A: They can't put 3 w's together.
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